Dear Dr. Sears,

I am writing this letter to you (and publishing it for the whole world to see) because you saved my relationship with my baby! When I was about 7 months pregnant with Adam – my first and only child – I bought The Baby Book: Everything you need to know about your baby from birth to age two. I read it all but I intentionally skipped all the parts about fussy babies, crying babies, unable to sleep babies, and similar topics. Reading your introduction about attachment parenting and then delving into the details of bonding, breastfeeding, babywearing, co-sleeping, and avoiding trainers made me realize that we were certainly on the same page! I was positive that with all the love I have to give Adam, he will certainly be the happiest and most content baby in the world!

Adam was born on April 18, 2011 and our birth experience was traumatic for both of us! My first sentiment towards him was resentment; I kept asking him why he did not work with me to have the birth we both wanted! Eventually we went home and the first few days passed quietly and happily then bam! Suddenly Adam would have high-pitch crying fits that would last from a couple of hours to a whole day only to be interrupted by exhaustion sleep. No matter what I did, he screamed! I held him, he arched his back! I hugged him, he pulled away! I tired to massage him – and do all the nice bonding things that I read about – he tensed his muscles and screamed louder. One thing worked though; I would carry him and go up and down the stairs until I was panting – literally panting. I interpreted his behavior as a clear sign that he did not like me! I would just sit there and cry next to him not knowing what I was doing wrong. 

My mother and I would take turns carrying him but we both failed miserably. His fits usually started by 2 in the afternoon and ended by 7 or 8 at night. When he went to sleep, I heard a buzz in my ears from all the screaming. I dreaded the mornings and I wanted to fast forward the afternoons! Then I took out your book and I started reading it with a new pair of eyes. I put all my expectations aside and decided that I would not compare Adam – ever – to other kids or to the image I had of him before he was born – he is who he is and I love him just the way he is. You asked parents to look at things from the perspective of the baby; what did Adam see? I realized that he was having difficulty adapting! He took that trait after me! I could easily relate! One day he was cozy and comfortable in his own little bubble in my womb and suddenly he was forced outside of me (abdominal pushing) then pulled out (forceps). He was greeted earthside with pain, left in a glass box for 4 days, I got to breastfeed him after 4 days, and I held him skin to skin after 7 days! He was having difficulty adapting to the noises, scents, lights, and me!

I decided the send him back inside me – as much as I could! I dimmed the lights, turned off any source of noise including my cell phone, breastfed him as much as he wanted whenever he wanted, I was always next to him so he never had to cry for food or comfort, and I wore him in our wrap for hours and hours everyday. It took us about two more months to get rid of those frantic crying fits then we moved to another high need! He does not self soothe or play on his own. I learned how to take him with me to the bathroom, to the shower, to the kitchen,  and anywhere I went – were were glued. The funny thing is that once I began listening to his needs and fulfilling them, I began having fun with him. I enjoyed how much he needed me and how my embrace meant the world to him. I got used to talking to him and explaining what I was doing. Then I turned into an animated woman .. I talk like the people in cartoon movies with facial expressions, tone, and movement. 

Work, chores, and other pressing duties were tossed aside and rescheduled. I decided to take the slow lane for sometime and enjoy the journey. You wrote in your book that a high need baby with an attentive responsive mother was a combination that would bring out the best in both of them! This is exactly what happened! Adam is constantly teaching me how to mother him and I am loving the aspects of my new found personality! I am more fun and laid back! You were right again when you stressed that he is only a baby once and that eventually he would outgrow each phase. I wear him and take long walks everyday, we go shopping together, we sing along (babble along) in the car, and he laughs at my jokes and goofy faces!  I bought a Blackberry phone and take advantage of his very brief naps to check my mail. When the weather is nice (which is almost daily in Egypt) we go outdoors. Thanks to the long walks, I am almost back to my pre-pregnancy weight. His sleeping got better at night now that he know that I am not going anywhere. He also appreciates my creativity and spares me the "bath fights", the "nail trimming fights", the "diaper changing fights", and the "it's time to eat fights". They are all games and fun times. I don't have to worry about pacifiers or bottles because he uses neither. He got over the fear of strangers and is now greeting everyone we pass by in our walks with smiles and laughter. His hyperactivity is helping me reinvent ways of entertaining him. I am still drained by happy. We are still working on his sense of urgency but getting there.

I want to thank you for warning me of baby trainers! I was tempted so many times to switch to formula milk or to introduce solids earlier than 6 months, or to let him cry it out, or to put him down when he wanted to be carried! Thank you for saving us both from this power struggle! Adam is manifesting the 12 signs of high need babies and I am loving the intensity of the upside of his personality. His love and passion is intense; he surprises me with little gestures that assure me that we are on the right track and that we are bonding well. 

Queen Painted By: Sara El Hamalawy.
Designed By: Ahmed Mohamed Hassan.

Resurrection of Ancient Egypt – Short Story Competition

The Forgotten Writers foundation is offering its first short story competition with the title of “Resurrection of Ancient Egypt”. Egypt’s history has always been a mystery, especially the one of Ancient Egypt. Many of our classical writers were inspired by those great people who we named differently by human kind, some thought they were aliens from space, some thoughts they were infidels, some stories said that they were gods and goddesses, just and unjust, some said they were blessed, some said that they were cursed, and others strongly believe that they were Sufis!

The aim of this competition is to discover and measure how each one of us defines our Egypt through its ancient history, through writing fictional stories which occurred in such an era. Historical facts – if used – can be used only as a background for the main story. There are neither boundaries nor restrictions in the writing style or genre. The writer is given the right to do anything, for the blank piece of paper is your own realm, and one has no right in limiting ones creation.

The formal deadline is on the 25^th of January, 2012. However, stories after the deadline will be accepted into serious consideration. The most satisfying output is more important than being strict in the rules.

The winning stories will be gathered in one book and published. An analysis will be written on the stories to measure how Egyptians view their own history and how Non-Egyptians view one of the most ancient civilizations in humankind, and linking such analysis to our contemporary world.

As an Egyptian, Reading and Writing in English is one of the vital methods of maintaining ‘eye contact’ with the rest of the world. We are very good consumers in reading, which is great as a first step, but now we owe the world our own stories, philosophies and wisdom.

For Guidelines:

http://mahmoudmansicriticreviews.blogspot.com/2011/12/short-story-competition-resurrection-of.html

Submissions and Questions: Attention Mahmoud Mansi

Native_Writer@yahoo.com

Image by Gaberism

THIS ARTICLE WAS PUBLISHED IN IDENTITY MAGAZINE IN DECEMBER 2011

DOCUMENTING REVOLUTION EGYPT – PART TWO

PART ONE: HERE

On January 25^th, 2011 thousands of Egyptians occupied Tahrir square in the biggest anti-regime demonstration. On January 28^th, aka Friday of Anger, central security forces (CSF) used live ammunition, tear gas, metal pellets, water hoses, and rubber bullets to disperse protesters resulting in the death of 800 martyr and the injury of more than 5000 Egyptian. Demonstrations filled every square in Egypt! Millions of Egyptians marched demanding freedom, equality, and social justice. On February 11^th Mohamed Hosni Mubarak – Egyptian President for the last 30 years – stepped down. Between January 25^th and February 11^th Egypt witnessed the resignation of the Nazeef Cabinet, the short-lived Ahmed Shafik Cabinet, the first Deputy President Omar Soliman, armored vehicles in the streets, camels and horses attacking protesters in a scene from Arabian Nights, curfews, torching of government buildings, prison-breaks, and the downfall of the infamous state security building. A new chapter in Egyptian history began when Essam Sharaf was appointed Prime Minister and the Supreme Council of Armed Forces (SCAF) promised to hand over power within 6 months. Tahrir revolutionaries and the Egyptian public were happy and optimistic!

Over the past 9 months the decisions and actions of SCAF have been a constant disappointment for Egyptians; almost every Friday, there was a demonstration of some sort fighting one form of injustice or the other. Egypt has not changed! It is even safe to say that things have deteriorated! Evacuating Tahrir square by force on several occasions in March, April, June, and Ramadan, random arrests, military trials for civilians (more than 12,000 Egyptian), virginity tests to humiliate Egyptian girls who were arrested from the square (denied at first then confirmed anonymously to CNN correspondent), draft laws prohibiting peaceful demonstrations, the appointment of a Minister of Information( one of the main demands of the revolution was freedom of press), members from SCAF putting a low ceiling for freedom of expression on talk shows (Dina AbdelRahman lost her successful morning TV show on Dream because she dared question an army official live on the phone), bloggers being arrested for criticizing SCAF (Maikel Nabil), activists detained (Alaa AbdelFattah), a long list of human rights violations, violence against protesters in front of the Israeli embassy, churches being burnt or demolished, hundreds of Christians killed in the Maspiro massacre in October, the officers who killed protesters in January 25 revolution were not prosecuted, and slow trials of former minister of interior, former president and his two sons, former corrupt ministers, and corrupt businessmen. Prices continued to skyrocket and most Egyptians struggled with their jobs and meeting their essential needs.

On Friday, November 18^th – 10 days before the parliamentary elections – hundreds of thousands of Egyptians headed to Tahrir square once again in the biggest demonstration since Mubarak stepped down. They were rejecting the supra-constitutional principles that would have given the military infinite power over Egypt even after a civilian president has been elected. They were also demanding that SCAF hands over power to a civilian government. By sunset, the members of the Muslim Brotherhood and other Islamist political forces left the square while others stayed until SCAF responded to their demands. About 50 victims and families of martyrs from January 25^th revolution gathered in the square demanding compensation and medical treatment. They claimed that the current government did not fulfill its promises and that murderers from the police force were still free. By noon, on Saturday 19^th officers from the army and the police evacuated the square by force! Activists who were present in the square at the time posted pictures and videos on Twitter and Facebook – they asked for support and backup!

This was how Revolution Egypt Part Two started!

FACTS & FIGURES IN 6 DAYS:

·         More than 40 Egyptians died

·         About 1700 were injured

·         383 people were arrested

·         12 makeshift hospitals were established

·         A wall was built to separate revolutionaries and police forces in Mohamed Mahmoud Street

·         Hundreds of thousands protested everyday demanding the downfall of the Moshir (Field Marshall Tantawi)

·         Live ammunition, tear gas, nerve damaging gas, rubber bullets, and tazers were used against protesters

·         Tantawi gave one speech denying violence and blaming "invisible fingers". His speech infuriated the protesters and their chants against him grew louder

·         SCAF held one press conference emphasizing that parliamentary elections will be held on time; Monday 28^th. They denied the use of violence, ammunition, chemical gas, military trials, and assured people that the presidential elections will be held by June 2012

AMAZING EGYPT

·         About 2000 women marched on Tuesday 22^nd to support the revolution and to poke holes into the stereotypical image of passive politically apathetic women

·         Salma El Daly (symbol of the duck) called for a women's march named Masyret Masreyat on Tuesday 22^nd – the purpose of that march was to head to Mohamed Mahmoud street, march to the front lines, and stand ahead of the male revolutionaries. This was Salma's genius idea to force police officers to cease fire and to put an end to bloodshed

·         Volunteer doctors who saved many lives in the makeshift hospitals

·         Volunteer doctors in various specializations who will treat the injured for free

·         Egyptians on motor bikes carrying the wounded to get medical assistance

·         Egyptians lining up to donate blood to save the victims of the shootings

·         Volunteers carpooling allover Egypt to collect donations, medicine, blankets, and food from people at home supporting Tahrir

·         Tahrir residents who left their wireless connection password-free so that protesters can tweet and broadcast live

·         Volunteers who took brooms and plastic bags to clean up Tahrir

·         On Thursday 24^th a group of doctors climbed the brick wall separating the revolutionaries from the security forces and took shifts through the night and into Friday morning to stop any clashes between the two parties

·         Egyptian activists uploaded a video showing the face of the police officer who targeted the eyes of the revolutionaries, the morning after there was a graffiti of him on the walls – wanted! Later on his name, phone and address were circulating on social networks, and on Friday 25^th he was arrested!

·         The ULTRAS once again outdid themselves! Their experience with combating central security forces saved the day in January 25^th revolution and they bravely stood in the front lines during the 6 days uprising in November. Their chants and songs are phenomenal!

POPULAR HASHTAGS ON TWITTER

#TahrirSupplies and #TahrirNeeds were created to help people who were not in the square know what is needed in terms of food, medicine, volunteer doctors, money, etc.

#CentralElTharwa gathers donations from people and recharges mobile phones of those in Tahrir and ran out of credit

#law3andaldam which translates into "if you have blood" was started to guide people to where and how to donate blood for the makeshift hospitals and the hospitals near Tahrir that need blood for the victims of the CSF attacks

#TahrirChants documented the creative and fabulous chants by protesters

#FreeMaikel and #FreeMaikelNabil were created many months ago to support pacifist and blogger Maikel Nabil who was taken from his home, subjected to a military trial, and sentenced to three years because he wrote a blog post criticizing the policies of SCAF. Maikel is still in Jail.

#FreeAlaa was created on October 30^th after blogger and activist Alaa AbdelFattah was detained and was sentenced to 15 days, after refusing to be interrogated by the Military Prosecutor, in protest against its legitimacy. Alaa is still in jail.

#FreeMona was created on November 24^th after prominent journalist Mona Eltahawy was beaten up and arrested by police officers and military intelligence. Mona was freed the day after with a broken arm, a broken wrist, and lots of bruises. She was sexually assaulted by more than 6 officers.

#FreeMaged was also created on November 24^th after Maged El Samny was arrested. The brilliant architect is specialized in nano architecture and was actively delivering supplies and donations in Tahrir. He was arrested and beaten up. His picture all bruised and stitched up made it to social networks!

#da2een3asafeer was created after Tantawi's speech! "Da2een 3asafeer" is an Egyptian slang expression when someone takes you for a fool!

#egyelections monitors reactions to people on the coming parliamentary elections; some people were worried about violence, corruption, and bloodshed. Others were worried about lack of security. Some used this tag when referring to the Islamist parties and others used it when SCAF refused to postpone elections.

#FreeJehane and #FreeJehan were created on November 24^th when Egyptian-American film-maker Jehan Noujaime was arrested while filming a documentary about Tahrir. She was released late the day after. She was charged with congregation and destruction of public property.

#FreeMisr is used by tweeps when they feel oppressed or hopeless. Used a lot after Tantawi's speech and after the arrest of Alaa, Mona, Maged, and Jehan.

#HelioCarMarch was created by Heliopolis parliamentary candidate Mahmoud Salem, aka Sandmonkey, to spread awareness about a march from Heliopolis to Tahrir by cars on November 25^th. He invited people to join in and make a lot of noise.

#NoSCAF is a hashtag documenting people's frustrations with SCAF policies and decisions. This hashtag has been used since the beginning to the random arrests, torture and humiliation, and military trials starting March 2011.

#OccupyMaspero is an invitation to invade the Radio and Television Building down town and purify it of all the lies and fallacies. This is how angry people are with this media body that twists facts and does not represent the people.

#GanzouryTimes was created on November 24^th when rumor had it that 78 year old Kamal El Ganzoury will be appointed Prime Minister. The theme of the hashtag is punning and wordplay on Ganzoury's age and the fact that he was already prime minister back in the nineties in the era of former President Mubarak. The tweets in this hashtag are hillarious if you need a good laugh!

WORST SCENES

·         Videos of officers throwing dead bodies into the garbage

·         Videos of snipers on rooftops

·         Pictures of revolutionaries with bandaged eyes after being hit by rubber bullets

·         Gas filling the air and people choking and dying because of it

·         Tantawi addressing Egyptians and repeating the same old regime rhetoric

·         Egyptian television lying and enticing against protesters

·         Pictures of activists that were severely beaten up by police and military

·         Video of a female protester being dragged in the street by officers

·         Videos of testimonials of female activists who were beaten and sexually assaulted by officers (Bothaina Kamel and Mona Eltahawy)

·         Answers of the SCAF members in the press conference that was held on Thursday 24^th

·         Sexual harassment during demonstrations on Friday 25^th

CLASSIC LIES

·         No live ammunition was used

·         Tear gas is of international quality

·         No chemical gas (nerve damaging) was used against protesters

·         Protesters in Tahrir are thugs

·         Protesters are paid

·         Foreign infiltrators are among the honorable revolutionaries

·         Hidden agendas of foreign countries and politicians

·         The military did not fire at or rundown any Egyptians

·         The officers "freaked out" and were acting on their own when they attacked protesters in Mohamed Mahmoud street for 6 days

·         Thugs stole officer weapons and are firing at people

·         Officers do not have weapons in the first place

·         The Minister of Interior is bedridden and did not give any orders to attack

·         Tahrir is not Egypt

AT A GLANCE: FRIDAY 25^TH "THE LAST CHANCE ONE MILLION MARCH"

·         Demonstrations in Cairo and 11 more governorates including Sharm El Sheikh, Assuit, Menya, Sohag, Alexandria, Mahalla, Suez, Port Said, and Ismailia.

·         El Baradie praying with people in Tahrir square

·         Main chant "The People demand the downfall of El Moshir"

·         78-year old Kamal El Ganzoury was appointed Prime Minister.

He held a press conference attended by a maximum number of 9 journalists in an open air area. There was one microphone in front of the journalists and it was difficult for the audience to hear the questions. His replies could be summed up in one statement: anyone in his right mind would have declined that post but he accepted for Egypt and he does not have a plan yet.

In reaction to Kamal El Ganzoury's appointment, hundreds of activists headed to the Egyptian cabinet headquarters and started a protest there to prevent the new Prime Minster and his not-yet-hired cabinet from entering the building.

·         The political entities in Tahrir suggested several people to form Egypt's civilian government of national salvation; former director of the International Atomic Energy Agency and presidential hopeful Mohamed ElBaradei, ex-Muslim Brotherhood member and presidential hopeful Abd El-Moneim Abu El-Fotouh, Karama Party member and presidential hopeful Hamdin El-Sabahi, economist Ahmed El-Naggar, prominent physician Mohamed Ghoneim and judge Zakaria Abd El-Aziz.

·         In Abbaseya square, a couple of thousand Egyptians gathered by noon and started a pro-SCAF demonstration. They said that their main concern is stability and that Tahrir people are ruining the country.

TO VOTE OR NOT TO VOTE

Egypt's first parliamentary elections after the revolution were scheduled to start on November 28, 2011. Several candidates put their promotional campaigns on hold and joined Tahrir square. Political entities with the expection of the Islamists urged the Supreme Council of Armed Forces to postpone the elections for two weeks. SCAF refused and insisted that the elections took  place as scheduled.

Revolutionaries in Tahrir square had mixed feelings about whether to vote or not; the ones who decided to bycott the elections perceived SCAF as illegitimate and that any elections under their rule are void. Those who decided thought that bycotting the elections is like punishing your parents by not going to a party with them! They decided to vote to try to save what was left of the integrity of the elections.

The three stage of the elections are scheduled to take place on November 28, December 14, and January 3, 2012 over the period of two days per stage. 50 million Egyptian are entitled to vote in Egypt and 166,000 voted abroad in 127 polling stations in Egyptian embassies allover the world. The voters will select 498 members of parliament; 332 of which are lists and 166 are independent candidates. 

PART ONE: HERE

‎

هل تريد خوض تجربة قد تغير المشهد التلفزيوني المصري؟

الفرصة متاحة أمامك للاشتراك في برنامج تلفزيون واقع جديد من نوعه يتم إنتاجه لأول مرة في مصر. ‎

برجاء الإطلاع على الشروط أدناه وملء الاستمارة التالية :

شروط الاشتراك:

• أن يكون سن المتقدم يتراوح بين 21 إلى 29 سنة.

• أن يكون المتقدم مستعداً لوجود كاميرات في جميع الأماكن اليومية الخاصة به (النادي، مكان العمل،….) لمدة شهرين.

• أن تكون عائلة وأصدقاء ومحيط المتقدم مستعدين لوجود كاميرات تصورهم للمدة ذاتها في أوقات معينة من حين إلى آخر.

• الاستعداد للتصوير في الفترة من فبراير إلى أبريل 2012.

• لا يشترط التفرغ للتصوير حيث سيتمكن المشتركون من ممارسة حياتهم الطبيعية.

• أن يكون على علم بأن ما سيتم تصويره سيعرض على شاشة التلفزيون.

• أن يكون على علم بأنه سيتم استخدام ما تم تصويره في وسائط إعلامية متعددة.

• أن لا يكون المشترك ممثلا أو وجهاً معروفاً.

• أن لا يكون قد اشترك سابقاً في أي برنامج لتلفزيون الواقع.

• يمكنك إرسال فيديو بحد أدنى دقيقة و حد أقصى دقيقتين يعبر عن شخصيتك و تتحدث فيه عن نفسك. الفيديو ليس شرط للتقديم لكن قد يساعد في اختيارك .يجب أن يكون عنوان الفيديو هو الإسم الكامل بالاستمارة.

• يملك البرنامج حقوق بث واستخدام كل المواد التي تم تصويرها لكل الشخصيات المشاركة وذلك على التلفزيون والإنترنت وجميع الوسائط الإعلامية.

• بإرسال الاستمارة يتم الموافقة علي الشروط السابقة. ‬ يرجي إرسال الاستمارة كاملة و الإستفسارات و الأسئلة علي:

filmclinic@mad-solutions.com

لتحميل الإستمارة إضغط هنا  

"Would you tell me what your fathers do?"

This is what Arnold Schwarzenegger, played Detective John Kimble, asked in the movie "Kindergarten Cop".

A kindergarten is a place where you get honest answers … honest; yet hurtful … or maybe hurting, if you're still having issues with your inner child …

Kids began answering the question.

Interesting answers …

Funny answers …

Heart-breaking answers …

Even embarrassing answers …

You name the answers!

I'll stick to one particular answer because, allow me, I relate to it.

The "D" word!

Personally, I see divorce as so/very fair!!

Divorce is not a shame … simply because God Announced it as a legal act …

He Doesn't Want any of the two to suffer and be stuck together under one roof: END OF STORY!

But in this article, I'm "talking" about the problems of "D": How parents use divorce unknowingly to sabotage their children, basically on the psychological level.

Let me start from the start …

Let's say that this child is living with their mother. What happens when the child says they want to see their father?

This mother will either say a direct no, which I find so stupid and naive!

Or; she will let the child go, and then afterwards, she will do her very best to prove that their father is a "bad guy", which I find even more stupid!

If she uses either "technique" … she will complete it by EMOTIONAL BLACKMAILING:

Most of the time, you will find that mother saying, "Your father left us. He ignored us. He ignored you. He's still ignoring you. I was and still am there for you. I never would leave you." … and it goes!

Still, she will do her very best to make the child feel guilty about judging her, if they ever think about saying, "You pushed daddy away. You don't want me to see him. You are keeping him away from me." Or they may hurt her so badly, if they say, "Daddy is not so bad; you're being unfair. He's kind unlike you're telling me!" … and it still goes! The keyword here is GUILTY.

And …

Another thing is REJECTION:

When that child, living with their mother asks to see their father …

The mother wants to support her child the best way she can … so she takes them there!

What happens when the father rejects the child, his very own child?

That would result in low self-esteem …

It would be super easy for them to feel rejected even when others don't mean it …

At this point, children feel that the man who's "supposed" to be loving them most is not there …

The most beautiful relationship: Father/Child is cracked … cracked because the father doesn't feel like "I want this relationship!" … It's sad and awful!

But I have understood this: When one parent rejects their very own child, then they don't have what it takes to be a parent … Sounds weird yet true!

When a colleague rejects you … it happens and it's not so weird.

But when your parent rejects you … it's not normal. Something has fallen from the equation … something that only your [high] self-esteem will help you get over.

If you're one of these children …

You'll get over it … I've been there one day. It takes time, but you will.

You will if you want … only if you want.

My Very Dear Reader,

I have no idea why I'm sharing this personal story … I guess it's for the sake of that kind of "strange" connection- writer/reader thing:

"My father left when I was eight …

I realized his absence when I was fifteen …

I went to see him when I was seventeen …

I had stopped contacting him before I turned nineteen … because I felt completely rejected.

I saw him exactly six times during the period of being between seventeen and nineteen …

Needless to say … it was awful!! He was not very encouraging anyways …

I used to tell my mother, "Why did you leave? You should've stayed in this marriage for me. You're a mother!"

Years later, I asked myself: How did my mother manage to stay with him for whole ten years?, when I couldn't stand him for a couple of hours …

Momma, TWO THUMBS UP!

As a twenty-year-old, I've got over my parents' divorce … I'm not ashamed to say that it took me three years to do it … But I'm glad to say I [finally] did it!"

I am not going to list do's and dont's to this kind of immature parents, so to speak … this is not my job.

But the battle of the exes certainly needs to stop.

STOP IT NOW because I think you love your children …

PUBLISHED IN IDENTITY MAGAZINE – NOVEMBER 2011

Early March 2010, Hala Diab – my friend and Dr. Bassem's wife – posted a link of the first episode of The Bassem Youssef Show – The B+ Show as it was originally called – on my wall on facebook. At the time I was eight months pregnant and my online activity dropped tremendously. I did not watch the show but I left the link on my wall. Within a few days, the episode went viral and everyone was sharing it. Bloggers were writing about Bassem Youssef. More episodes followed that were met with the same success. I got out of my cave and watched that first episode and laughed … I laughed out loud as I enjoyed the satire! A few weeks later I gave birth and was totally sucked into motherhood. In Ramadan 2011 – 4 months later – I was happily surprised to see Bassem Youssef on ONTV's screen! "The Program" became the new name of "B+" and the show maintained its original spirit but developed into full blown 30 minute episodes.

Dr. Bassem says that

Being on television is more demanding because of your commitment to your audience; there are deadlines and a certain number of episodes that people expect to see per week. The online arena is more flexible in that sense.

Censorship is one of the main reasons people flee mainstream media but the good doctor has another opinion

When it comes to censorship, the ceiling is more or less the same; you could say anything you want as long as you know how to present it properly. We had several episodes about the most recent Maspero events and we said what we wanted to say without getting ourselves in trouble.

I monitored mentions of Dr. Bassem Youssef on Twitter, and I realized that you either love his show or completely hate it! The comments ranged from praise or serious discussions to harsh criticism or downright aggression. Bassem prefers being on TV

I don't miss "The Bassem Youssef Show"! Online, I was doing all the work and I reached a very limited audience – a very hostile audience, I might add! Something is seriously wrong with people! I got a lot of hits and comments on the YouTube videos but some people just cuss and curse because they can! Mainstream media is more rewarding in that aspect! No one will stop me in the street to curse me! Whether I am on YouTube or on TV, I put in a lot of effort but television audience is more appreciative!

Other people, like Doaa Sultan for example, pull out videos and make fun of them or of people in them but there is something different about Dr. Bassem's show! Bassem himself as a presenter is different; his body language, tone, facial expressions, and the way he carries himself in general make him a very serious person but his show is funny. This contrast is what makes Dr. Bassem Youssef special. His aura reminds me of actor Abdel Salam El Naboulsy; very serious yet very comic!

In my show, I don’t just make fun of videos; I am not a standup comedian! People are used to shows that are either too serious or too farcical and this is why they cannot categorize us. We do have a message and at the same time we do make people smile! Political satire is difficult to create and more difficult to process. Dr. Bassem explains.

The last episode before writing this piece was on October 15, 2011. Bassem treaded a very thin line as he discussed the recent Maspero violence on Black Bloody Sunday and how official media dealt with the incident. He also discussed how rumors spread in Tahrir Square. The topic is very serious and the actual event is sad but Bassem made me laugh outloud in the beginning of the show when he was introducing Dr. Essam Sharaf's official statement, and said:

"Great news to all Egyptians: Dr. Essam Sharaf is alive and kicking!"

This whip lash of a comment is how Dr. Bassem runs his show!

 In that episode he clearly mocked the government's announcement that the armored vehicle which ran down protesters was stolen, that there is a foreign conspiracy behind the clashes, and so forth.

He did not cross any red lines but he skillfully delivered the message: the government is still lying and feeding people lies!

It is hard to predict the future of shows and presenters; some people start with a buzz that fades away with time while others creep on you slowly but surely.

Jon Stewart inspires me! As a practicing surgeon, I never saw myself doing a show but I have always toyed with the fantasy of having my own TV show. Next year, if people still enjoy The Program, we would like to grow into a cross between Jon Stewart and David Letterman – maybe have a show with real live audience!

IDENTITY MAGAZINE – NOVEMBER 2011

EL GOMHOREYA TV

One happy morning the colors on my television decided to stick to green and blue! I insisted on watching. A few days later, my receiver broke down! I took it as a sign from above that TV is bad for a lactating mama like myself (breastfeeding ya3ni!) I remembered my dear friend Shady Sherif and decided to pay his El Gomhoreya TV a visit (http://www.elgomhoreya.tv)

I loved it! The major strengths of this channel are excellent streaming and fast browsing, the choice to subscribe to updates to your favorite shows, and perfect use of social media sharing tools. There is also a big obvious visible button saying "To send us your work click here" – this is an invitation for people to participate and become active players in El Gomhoreya TV. Now I do not have TV at home, I watch El Gomhoreya TV on the television screen and I lived happily ever after!

Shady Sherif clearly states his mission saying:

El Gomhoreya TV aims at opening a window of opportunity for all those talents who were rejected by mainstream media because they lack connections or fame and glamour. During and after the revolution, many talented writers, presenters, artists, and moviemakers emerged to the surface and we want them to find a home and an audience on El Gomhoreya TV. They will be given the opportunity and the financial support!

For those of you who think that online TV is for young people only, think again!

الشعب عايز ياكل و يشرب لكن دى ثورة جيل … جيل  زهق و طهق!

احنا مش جيل عايز الحرق … احنا جيل قام و انتفض و قال كلمة حق

Those were Shady's words when he described the audience of his online TV channel; he is not targeting the audience of mainstream media with their stereotypical expectations of talk shows and guests. Nevertheless, his audience is not limited to youth; the programs are targeting those who have the enthusiasm and passion of youth regardless of their age.

Content is the king when it comes to media; if what we offer is worth watching, then people will watch us whether we are online or on TV.

EL GOMHOREYA TV SHOWS

Shady describes his shows saying:

Our programs are catchy and witty but family-friendly! There is nothing obscene or offensive in what we offer because El Gomhoreya TV is for everyone! We discuss politics and other hot topics without offending the viewers or alienating them.

E7na – On Mondays

One of the most important and daring youth shows undertaken by the prominent director Sherif Arafa. The editorial team of E7na Magazine takes on a selection of the most important and controversial youth topics, in a new and intriguing manner.

I was personally a part of this program and I enjoyed working with all those creative people. I also lived with Shady the dilemma of finding a TV channel to take on board!

Shady Sherif says about this experience:

Since we first started Campus magazine eleven years ago we adopted a unique media strategy in terms of content, branding, marketing, and sales. We do not have a sales department and our strategy attracts sponsors and business partners. After getting married, I was totally broke and by 2008, I saved a good amount of money and I invested it in a show called E7NA – like the name of our Arabic magazine!

Producing the show cost an arm and a leg and I partnered with Sherif Arafa to facilitate distributing its rights afterwards. We presented the pilot episode to many TV channels and I learnt the hard way that mainstream media in Egypt is twisted and corrupt! Some channels tried to steal the idea, others wanted to steal members of our team and produce their own version of the show. They all wanted commercial shows featuring stars and celebrities not a down to earth youth program featuring talents and real life issues. I lost my investment and I decided to create my own TV channel. I was shocked when I found out that broadcasting signal alone costs $300,000 USD!

I attended several media conferences worldwide to learn about this new industry that I was venturing into, and the buzz word was "digital"! Everyone was going digital! This was when I decided to create El Gomhoreya TV. It took us two years of preparation and hard work and when the time was right, we launched our channel.

Hezb El Kanaba – On Tuesdays

A married couple who support the ex-regime live in Tahrir, during the heart of the events. They interview a number of prominent characters in the political and social arena and together they delve into comedic conflicts with their guests, as they try to talk them out of their revolutionary ideas.

I watched the episode with Mahmoud Salem – AKA Sandmonkey. I enjoyed the debate! Riham and Ezzat are hilarious! The guests are unpretentious and present their points with simplicity. What I enjoyed the most was the fact that the presenters gave the guest a chance to talk!

Ekhtarna Lak – on Wednesdays

A show inspired by the famous “Ekhtarna Lak” that used to be aired on Egyptian TV in the 80s. Every episode of the show introduces a selection of the funniest and rarest videos that have been aired on TV channels or have gone viral on the internet, all presented in a creative and comedic manner.

I watched an episode titled "Abyad we Eswed Top Scenes" which was a collage of 15 of the funniest and most memorable scenes from Egyptian black and white movies! I had a constant smile on my face as the selected scenes stirred waves of nostalgia to the good old days when I was a kid and a teen in the making. The sketches were short and the whole episode was brief and light – perfect for those who watch from work!

Other shows include El Nas Dol, PMC Egypt, Hayaty, Make Up Your Mind, and El Share3 Yoghanny. El Gomhoreya TV also has a section for short movies, V-Blogs (video blogs), and series.

I wonder what the future holds for this dynamic entrepreneur but his aspirations are:

Next year, I am looking forward to expanding regionally and attracting talents from Jordan, Saudi Arabia, and other countries. I also hope that one day we will have our own TV channel to reach those who do not have access to the internet

Where do I start with this one!

I'm embarrassed to admit that I'm a deceiving, unfaithful friend… but YES, I'm. I'll briefly tell you my story and I need your honest advice but please don’t be judgmental in your reply. I have been happily married for the past 15 years and then one year ago, everything just changed in a glimpse of an eye. My husband and I started not to bare each other, living together turned out to be like a real nightmare. We totally lost communication and we were fighting constantly. We decided to go to a counselor, but actually this step widened the gap between us more. After failing in all trials, we mutually decided to get divorced. After my divorce, my best friend (Dalia) and her Husband (Aly) were very supportive to me and without them, it would have been unbearable. To cut a long story short, I often go out with Aly on my own and Dalia hasn’t a problem with it, she trusts me so much. She asks him at times to drive me home if it's late or go out with me for a chat, if I feel down or need an advice if she's busy to meet me. Two months ago, we were out for a drink and Aly told me that he was in love with me! For a few days, I was in shock and didn’t know how I felt; he had been a good friend for six years. He tried to get closer to me expressing his deep love, but I was always resisting and rejecting him. But then, when he said he needed to distance himself from me, as I didn't feel the same, things changed. I wanted him in my life and couldn’t stand the though of not having contact with him. I told him I loved him and didn’t want that. Things picked up from there and we started getting more involved emotionally and physically. Then the guilt set in on both sides. We said we needed to stay friends, but then it hasn’t happened as words are easier said then done. My emotions are all over the place. He texts me all the time telling me how much he loves me, but openly admits he loves his wife as well and this ironically kills me. Over the last few days he has been talking to me, but isn’t saying anything about us, just everyday things. I feel he is having doubts again, and unfortunately I am in deep with him. I don’t know what to do. He is married to my best friend and I feel so guilty and a back stabber, but I can't help loving him. I really have tried to stop this and so has he, it's just so strong. I am really struggling and feel myself going down a deep dark hole. Please help

Dear Unfaithful Friend

I will not judge you; actually, I really have a lot of sympathy for you! You are not an evil person; you are just a woman on a rebound. Do you know how a patient falls in love with the physician? Or how a patient falls in love with a nurse? Or how a student falls in love with a teacher? What you are going through is very similar! In the examples I gave, one party is strong and well-positioned while the other is lost, sick, or in need. In your case, you were defeated, hurt, and exhausted. It does not matter who left who or who broke up with who; what really matters is the pain and effort you exerted trying to make it work then the pain and effort you exerted trying to move on, and finally the pain and effort you are now exerting to feel wanted and happy again.

Breakups are never easy and after 15 years of marriage, you forgot who you were or what you did with your life before you got married. You no longer know who you are or what you want! Your friend's husband was your rock; he should have been the doctor or the teacher but he became the "thief". He took advantage of your weakness and confusion. I will not waste my reply on him; I want to address you!

What will you get out of this "relationship"? Marriage? I hope you are not counting on that! He will never marry you; you are the fling and your friend is the real thing. The only thing you will get for sure is a broken heart! 

If he leaves you after a while, you will become the affair that came to an end – BROKEN HEART!

If he leaves your friend to be with you, you will become the home-wrecker and eventually he will leave you. Also, you will certainly lose your friend – BROKEN HEART!

I want you to put things into perspective to minimize the damage; do not keep saying that you are deeply in love with him! Say that you are going through a phase and it is coming to an end; that you are on the rebound from a marriage that just ended and you will come to your senses soon; that you just lost a husband and you cannot afford to lose a great friend.

Instead of putting all your energy and passion into "A Man", I want you to try sports, a new hobby, a career goal, community services, or politics! Consume that energy into something else until you regain your balance and confidence.