{"id":11689,"date":"2018-07-01T01:32:44","date_gmt":"2018-06-30T23:32:44","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?p=11689"},"modified":"2023-03-18T01:35:28","modified_gmt":"2023-03-17T23:35:28","slug":"ask-marwa-in-love-with-two-guys-at-the-same-time","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?p=11689","title":{"rendered":"Ask Marwa: In Love with Two Guys at the Same Time"},"content":{"rendered":"<pre><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Identity-Magazine-Marwa-Rakha-July-2018.jpg?ssl=1\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"11625\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?attachment_id=11625\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Identity-Magazine-Marwa-Rakha-July-2018.jpg?fit=1240%2C1754&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"1240,1754\" data-comments-opened=\"0\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;0&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"Identity Magazine &amp;#8211; Marwa Rakha &amp;#8211; July 2018\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Identity-Magazine-Marwa-Rakha-July-2018.jpg?fit=724%2C1024&amp;ssl=1\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-11625\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Identity-Magazine-Marwa-Rakha-July-2018.jpg?resize=800%2C1132&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"1132\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Identity-Magazine-Marwa-Rakha-July-2018.jpg?w=1240&amp;ssl=1 1240w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Identity-Magazine-Marwa-Rakha-July-2018.jpg?resize=212%2C300&amp;ssl=1 212w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Identity-Magazine-Marwa-Rakha-July-2018.jpg?resize=724%2C1024&amp;ssl=1 724w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Identity-Magazine-Marwa-Rakha-July-2018.jpg?resize=768%2C1086&amp;ssl=1 768w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Identity-Magazine-Marwa-Rakha-July-2018.jpg?resize=1086%2C1536&amp;ssl=1 1086w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/a>\r\nDear Marwa,\r\n\r\nPeople always complain about not finding love, but I found it. Two times... At the same time in fact! I am in love with two guys, and I am not sure if this is even possible, but I am truly in love with both of them.\r\n\r\nI live abroad, and I go to college there, but I come back to Egypt every summer. The summer before my freshman year in college, while I was in Egypt I met my first boyfriend, he is just amazing, kind, and we click together on so many levels. We couldn't help but fall in love with each other. It broke my heart that I had to leave to college, but there was nothing to be done. We didn't break up though, we decided to try and make it work. We did...until I met my other boyfriend in college.\r\n\r\nHe is the funniest guy you can ever meet! He radiates positive energy wherever he is. We got to know each other, and something in me prevented me from telling him about my boyfriend (who I kept in touch with). We became friends, and then more than just friends! I fell for him.\r\n\r\nWe started dating, and I promised myself that when I go back home, I would break up with my first boyfriend (whom I didn't tell about the second boyfriend)! When summer came, and I went back home, as soon as I saw my first boyfriend I remembered why I fell in love with him at the first place. I couldn't let go of him.\r\n\r\nI decided to break up with my college boyfriend, but when I went back I couldn't do it! For months I was depressed, I didn't know what to do, and what made it more complicated is that both of them were there for me! So I took a decision, I kept them a secret from each other, and I know how awful this sounds, and how selfish I am, but that's why I am reaching out for you. For four years I've been leading a double life, fortunately my two worlds didn't collide in anyway, but I can't do it anymore! Should I tell them the truth? Should I break up with one of them? Both of them? Please note that I am not faking my love toward them. Yes, it's still cheating. But I feel like there is two of me, and each one is in love with one of them. Can this happen?\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Dear In-Love-With-Two-Guys,<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">You do not have to choose unless you have to decide which marriage proposal you are going to accept. Relax!<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Ethically speaking, what you are doing would fall under lying and betrayal. But, technically speaking, you are involved in two platonic relationships that are more of friendships, than actual dating. Realistically speaking, a human being, man or woman, is capable of having feelings towards more than one person at the same time.<\/span>\r\n\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">A real relationship is a lot of work; you invest time, energy, emotions, and thinking into communication, understanding, planning, emotions, and sex. A real relationship is so consuming that at times, some people, decide to take a break from all the daily work.<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">The physical factor is also an element that needs to be considered. Whose kiss do you enjoy the most? Whose touch do you long for? Whose love-making makes you feel good about yourself and the relationship?<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Women are fully capable of having sex with more than one partner, physically speaking. But emotionally speaking, there is only one favorite \u2026 one person she longs for and wants to be with. In your case, you have feelings for two men, but you are only investing in a relationship with one of them \u2013 the one you met in college and get to see regularly.<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">The textbook advice would be to tell them both the truth, and bear the outcome. But can you handle losing one of them? Can you handle losing both of them?<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">My advice would be to just let it be!<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">I know that this sounds horrible, but I am a believer in natural selection; eventually, one of the relationships will fade away. One will prove itself wrong for you. One guy will totally win you over. One guy might get fed up of the long-distance relationship. The other guy might meet someone who gives more of herself. Both guys might decide that they want something different.<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">In other similar cases, a third guy would show up and would trump the other two. It might take a totally different person to show you what real love is, and that those two guys are just best friends to you. You never know what the future holds, but the current status quo would not last beyond college years.<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">For the time being, I want you to enjoy being young, happy, in love, loved, and sought after. Enjoy the companionship, the attention, and the warmth your two friends are offering. Everything comes to an end, eventually. Nothing glows forever. Until that end comes, just live in the present moment and do not torment yourself with guilt.<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Relationships are not carved in stone, and there is a fine line between love and friendship that men and women cross many times throughout the path of their relationship. I would just like to end my horrible advice with an ethical note:<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Do not make plans with either boyfriend. Do not make promises you cannot fulfill. Do not mislead either one into the forever after ending. Do not use big words. If one relationship gets more serious than the other, you would have to have a talk with the person you are leaving behind.<\/span><\/pre>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>People always complain about not finding love, but I found it. Two times&#8230; At the same time in fact! I am in love with two guys, and I am not sure if this is even possible, but I am truly in love with both of them.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_eb_attr":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1,16],"tags":[1453,55],"class_list":["post-11689","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-articles","category-identity-magazine","tag-ask-marwa","tag-identity-magazine-2"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- 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It's been a year and a few months since we broke up and I met a lot of guys and they all wanted a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a","link":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?cat=1"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/07\/Teen-231x300.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":8147,"url":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?p=8147","url_meta":{"origin":11689,"position":1},"title":"Ask Marwa: My Boyfriend cannot keep a Job!","author":"Marwa Rakha - \u0645\u0631\u0648\u0629 \u0631\u062e\u0627","date":"December 12, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"The problem is he never stays put in a job for more than 4 months which makes it impossible for us to get married. I can't face my family and afraid if we do get married, we don't have income to live. Please help.","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a","link":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?cat=1"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/12\/14915158_1297631273632193_3892879571278705674_n-216x300.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":175,"url":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?p=175","url_meta":{"origin":11689,"position":2},"title":"Ask Marwa: October 2009","author":"Marwa Rakha - \u0645\u0631\u0648\u0629 \u0631\u062e\u0627","date":"October 30, 2009","format":false,"excerpt":"Hello Princess If you want this relationship to work ... or any other relationship to work I want you to know the following: 1) There will be times when your man is super attentive and there will be others when he is busy with other things on his mind 2)\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a","link":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?cat=1"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/07\/Relationships1-289x300.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":187,"url":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?p=187","url_meta":{"origin":11689,"position":3},"title":"Ask Marwa: I like him BUT","author":"Marwa Rakha - \u0645\u0631\u0648\u0629 \u0631\u062e\u0627","date":"December 22, 2009","format":false,"excerpt":"This might be a very silly problem, maybe more of a teenager problem than a 22-year-old one! Here is the thing: there is \"this person\" in my lecture hall, who I've noticed since the beginning of the last college year. At first, it was no big deal, just a girl's\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a","link":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?cat=1"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/07\/Teenager-300x285.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":11667,"url":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?p=11667","url_meta":{"origin":11689,"position":4},"title":"Ask Marwa: Bored after 7 Years of Love","author":"Marwa Rakha - \u0645\u0631\u0648\u0629 \u0631\u062e\u0627","date":"August 1, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"I have been in a committed relationship with my boyfriend for almost 7 years now, we\u2019ve literally grown up together. For a year now, I have been very bored with our relationship and I feel like I have lost my connection with him.","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a","link":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?cat=1"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Identity-Magazine-Marwa-Rakha-August-2017.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Identity-Magazine-Marwa-Rakha-August-2017.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Identity-Magazine-Marwa-Rakha-August-2017.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Identity-Magazine-Marwa-Rakha-August-2017.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":5485,"url":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?p=5485","url_meta":{"origin":11689,"position":5},"title":"Ask Marwa: Do you think that men marry women just for the sex?","author":"Marwa Rakha - \u0645\u0631\u0648\u0629 \u0631\u062e\u0627","date":"December 8, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"I cannot talk to my mom about this but do you think that men marry women just for the sex? It is just disgusting! 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