{"id":11734,"date":"2021-01-01T03:00:00","date_gmt":"2021-01-01T01:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?p=11734"},"modified":"2023-03-18T03:01:12","modified_gmt":"2023-03-18T01:01:12","slug":"ask-marwa-change-of-relationship-status","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?p=11734","title":{"rendered":"Ask Marwa: Change of Relationship Status"},"content":{"rendered":"<pre><span style=\"color: #008000;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Identity-Magazine-Marwa-Rakha-Jan-2021.jpg?ssl=1\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"11650\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?attachment_id=11650\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Identity-Magazine-Marwa-Rakha-Jan-2021.jpg?fit=1448%2C2048&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"1448,2048\" data-comments-opened=\"0\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;0&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"Identity Magazine &amp;#8211; Marwa Rakha &amp;#8211; Jan 2021\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Identity-Magazine-Marwa-Rakha-Jan-2021.jpg?fit=724%2C1024&amp;ssl=1\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-11650\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Identity-Magazine-Marwa-Rakha-Jan-2021.jpg?resize=800%2C1131&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"1131\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Identity-Magazine-Marwa-Rakha-Jan-2021.jpg?w=1448&amp;ssl=1 1448w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Identity-Magazine-Marwa-Rakha-Jan-2021.jpg?resize=212%2C300&amp;ssl=1 212w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Identity-Magazine-Marwa-Rakha-Jan-2021.jpg?resize=724%2C1024&amp;ssl=1 724w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Identity-Magazine-Marwa-Rakha-Jan-2021.jpg?resize=768%2C1086&amp;ssl=1 768w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Identity-Magazine-Marwa-Rakha-Jan-2021.jpg?resize=1086%2C1536&amp;ssl=1 1086w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/a>\r\n\u201cChange of Status\u201d! Such a scary thought! Change from being married to getting divorced or widowed, from being in a relationship to being single, from being single to getting engaged, from having someone to being alone, or from being alone for such a long time to getting back on the dating arena \u2013 these are all \u201cto be dreaded\u201d situations.<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">If one has gotten used to be single, it is only natural to forget how \u201cthings were done\u201d. How and where do people meet up nowadays? What to say and do on a date? Where to go from that first date? The scariest thoughts are all related to intimacy; when and how to kiss or make out or have full intercourse?<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Those who were in a long-term relationship are not in a much better position. Sharing your day-to-day life with someone, taking decisions together, arguing, making up, being intimate, snuggling, comfortable silence, having meals together, showing up to parties and events as a couple \u2013 these are all addictive feelings and getting used to the opposite is excruciating.<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">If you are trying to adjust to a \u201cchange of status\u201d, the following tips might help:<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">First: Embrace your feelings; be it anger, sadness, loneliness, fear, anxiety, restlessness, or confusion, it is okay! It is natural and normal to feel the way you feel even if that change of status was your choice and decision. Avoid pretending that everything is fine when it is not \u2013 this is called denial and denial is a hurdle on your path to peace.<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Second: Give yourself time to feel confident and balanced again. After the guilt, anger, denial, and finger-pointing that come with the end of a relationship, eventually balance and peace will come into your life \u2013 if you allow them. After the loneliness, restlessness, and self-doubt that come with just the thought of dating again, eventually excitement and happiness will follow \u2013 only if you take it easy.<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Third: Take the slow lane. Whether you are adjusting to being single or getting used to the thought of meeting someone new, do not rush yourself. Uncertainty and relapses are normal. One step forward-two steps backwards are a natural rhythm at the beginning. This is a good time to go about life one day at a time. Do not make any plans or commitments.<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Fourth: No expectations. Expectations are the culprit behind disappointments. Curb those expectations when it comes to your ex, if he\/she is alive, or your new partner, whether you have met him\/her or not, and try to snap out of daydreaming and imaginary scenarios from involving the past or the future.<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Fifth: No assumptions. After expectations, assumptions are where most people go wrong when they are getting over someone or getting to know someone. Do not assume that your ex, his\/her friends and family, are doing this or that to spite you or hurt you. Do not assume that you will meet your perfect match on that trip or that the person you just met likes you, dislikes you, or is even looking for a steady relationship.<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Sixth: Watch out for memories and comparisons. If you are newly single, memories would most likely attack you while you are driving, cooking, or before going to bed. Just be prepared and remind yourself that what is done cannot be undone and shut that door. If you are trying to meet someone new, memories and comparisons will ruin any chances of happiness for you. Each phase of your life is special and will add depth to your character and emotional evolution. Consciously stop that line of thoughts.<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Seventh: You do not have to be on top of things. It is advisable for you to relax and go with the flow. Trying to control all the factors and givens would only stress you out. A little mess here and a little chaos there will not do any harm.<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Eighth: Give up on perfection. Trying look perfect, act perfectly, have everything in the perfect shape, and find the perfect man or woman is simply stressful. When a person is stressed, they usually make horrible choices and take very wrong decisions.<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Nineth: Be true to yourself. You deserve to be loved, accepted, and appreciated for who you are. Your previous partner(s) might have abused you and that is no reason to allow a new partner to treat you inappropriately. If you need help with this step, it would be great to talk to a therapist.<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Tenth: Surround yourself by true friends \u2013 those friends who would never judge you no matter what happened or what will happen. A true friend would never rub salt in your wounds and would never push you to do anything against your nature.<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #008000;\">Last word: whatever you do during that \u201cchange of status\u201d phase, do it for the right reasons. Do not do anything because you are hurt, vindictive, bored, lonely, pressured, afraid, angry, worried, eager, or simply because that is how others deal with the end of a relationship or finding a new partner.\u00a0<\/span><\/pre>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Last word: whatever you do during that \u201cchange of status\u201d phase, do it for the right reasons. Do not do anything because you are hurt, vindictive, bored, lonely, pressured, afraid, angry, worried, eager, or simply because that is how others deal with the end of a relationship or finding a new partner.\u00a0<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_eb_attr":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1,16],"tags":[1453,55],"class_list":["post-11734","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-articles","category-identity-magazine","tag-ask-marwa","tag-identity-magazine-2"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- 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\u0645\u0627\u0631\u064a\u0627 \u0645\u0648\u0646\u062a\u064a\u0633\u0648\u0631\u064a\u201d \u0639\u0646 \u0627\u0644\u0637\u0641\u0644 \u0648\u0627\u0644\u0628\u064a\u0626\u0629 \u0627\u0644\u063a\u0646\u064a\u0629 \u0627\u0644\u062a\u064a \u064a\u062d\u062a\u0627\u062c\u0647\u0627 \u0644\u064a\u0646\u0645\u0648 \u0648\u064a\u0632\u062f\u0647\u0631. \u062a\u0644\u062a \u0627\u0644\u0642\u0631\u0627\u0621\u0629 \u0627\u0644\u062d\u0631\u0629 \u062f\u0631\u0627\u0633\u0629 \u0645\u062a\u0639\u0645\u0642\u0629 \u0644\u0644\u0641\u0644\u0633\u0641\u0629 \u0648\u0627\u0644\u0645\u0646\u0647\u062c \u0645\u0639 \u0645\u0631\u0643\u0632 \u201c\u0623\u0645\u0631\u064a\u0643\u0627 \u0627\u0644\u0634\u0645\u0627\u0644\u064a\u0629 \u0644\u0644\u0645\u0648\u0646\u062a\u064a\u0633\u0648\u0631\u064a\u201d\u060cNorth American Montessori 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Love is overrated! All those romantic novels and movies filled our heads with ideas that do not necessarily belong there. Some people have an innate need for being with someone, belonging to that someone, and starting a family with that same someone. Others have an innate need\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a","link":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?cat=1"},"img":{"alt_text":"Identity Magazine August 2013","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/08\/Identity-Magazine-August-2013-212x300.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":8150,"url":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?p=8150","url_meta":{"origin":11734,"position":1},"title":"Ask Marwa: How to Cope with being Single on New Year&#8217;s Eve!","author":"Marwa Rakha - \u0645\u0631\u0648\u0629 \u0631\u062e\u0627","date":"December 12, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Your letter took me fifteen years down memory lane; to a time when we, girls, used to do anything to avoid showing up single at NYE\u2019s party. Some of us would start hunting a month before the big day while others would open up the \u201cfriend zone closet\u201d and pick\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a","link":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?cat=1"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/12\/15326379_1342201532508500_2242308847222957904_n-211x300.png?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":5942,"url":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?p=5942","url_meta":{"origin":11734,"position":2},"title":"Identity Magazine: Special Coverage &#8211; Interview with Mohamed El Nadi #Jan25 #Egypt","author":"Marwa Rakha - \u0645\u0631\u0648\u0629 \u0631\u062e\u0627","date":"March 15, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"In general I really couldn\u2019t sleep much for the past 20 days or so, mainly due to a general feeling every time I try that there are other heroes who are there in the cold, alone, in total fear of being attacked by thugs. And for the other reasons that\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a","link":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?cat=1"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/03\/Egypts-Uprising-Mohamed-El-Nadi-216x300.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":6396,"url":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?p=6396","url_meta":{"origin":11734,"position":3},"title":"Ask Marwa: Divorce after 2 Months?","author":"Marwa Rakha - \u0645\u0631\u0648\u0629 \u0631\u062e\u0627","date":"May 7, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"You are not alone! Many men and women realize from the first day of their marital lives that they made a mistake and that they got married to the wrong person. Let's be realistic about your situation and then it is up to you to decide where you want to\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a","link":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?cat=1"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/05\/Identity-Magazine-300x296.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":7893,"url":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?p=7893","url_meta":{"origin":11734,"position":4},"title":"Ask Marwa: Addicted to Summer Flings &#8230; Any Cure?","author":"Marwa Rakha - \u0645\u0631\u0648\u0629 \u0631\u062e\u0627","date":"September 27, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"My advice to you is: don\u2019t try to force yourself into a fake sense of readiness for stability and do not pretend to be someone that you are not. Until you are ready, be honest with yourself and your partner from the beginning about your feelings, expectations, and needs. The\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a","link":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?cat=1"},"img":{"alt_text":"13925434_1205939312801390_3531526639056905695_o","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/09\/13925434_1205939312801390_3531526639056905695_o-212x300.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":6348,"url":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?p=6348","url_meta":{"origin":11734,"position":5},"title":"ASK MARWA: Not All People Are Marriage Material","author":"Marwa Rakha - \u0645\u0631\u0648\u0629 \u0631\u062e\u0627","date":"March 1, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"I am a man in my late 20s. My life can be easily be defined as a series of bad relationships; I have this ability to always go for the worst possible option, lately though I\u2019m in this stable relationship with a person who respects and loves me. 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