{"id":6967,"date":"2015-01-15T08:40:49","date_gmt":"2015-01-15T06:40:49","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?p=6967"},"modified":"2015-01-15T08:40:49","modified_gmt":"2015-01-15T06:40:49","slug":"ask-marwa-i-am-spiritual-and-he-is-materialistic","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?p=6967","title":{"rendered":"Ask Marwa: I AM SPIRITUAL AND HE IS MATERIALISTIC"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>\n\t<a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/01\/10713990_842835275778464_8578440284599122880_o.jpg?ssl=1\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"6968\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?attachment_id=6968\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/01\/10713990_842835275778464_8578440284599122880_o.jpg?fit=1431%2C2048&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"1431,2048\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;0&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"10713990_842835275778464_8578440284599122880_o\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/01\/10713990_842835275778464_8578440284599122880_o.jpg?fit=716%2C1024&amp;ssl=1\" alt=\"10713990_842835275778464_8578440284599122880_o\" class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-6968\" height=\"300\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/01\/10713990_842835275778464_8578440284599122880_o.jpg?resize=210%2C300&#038;ssl=1\" width=\"210\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/01\/10713990_842835275778464_8578440284599122880_o.jpg?resize=210%2C300&amp;ssl=1 210w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/01\/10713990_842835275778464_8578440284599122880_o.jpg?resize=716%2C1024&amp;ssl=1 716w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/01\/10713990_842835275778464_8578440284599122880_o.jpg?w=1431&amp;ssl=1 1431w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 210px) 100vw, 210px\" \/><\/a>\n<\/p>\n<p>\n\tPublished in Identity Magazine &#8211; January 2015\n<\/p>\n<p>\n\t<span style=\"font-size:14px;\"><span style=\"font-family:tahoma,geneva,sans-serif;\">Dear Marwa,<\/span><\/span>\n<\/p>\n<p>\n\t<span style=\"font-size:14px;\"><span style=\"font-family:tahoma,geneva,sans-serif;\">I&rsquo;m a 23 years old girl. I&rsquo;ve been with my fianc&eacute; for 2 years now and I still can&rsquo;t get used to him being so materialistic. For him love and respect is all about money and I&rsquo;m not like that at all, I appreciate kind words and warm feelings, the perfect birthday gift for me is a nice dinner on candle light but he values expensive gifts that don&rsquo;t cost him a lot of effort.&nbsp; I love him and I&rsquo;m crazy about him but I&rsquo;m afraid it will affect my life on the long term in every aspect of our lives. I&rsquo;m also worried about the way will raise our kids; will we raise them up to be materialistic too? or spiritual?<\/span><\/span>\n<\/p>\n<p>\n\t<span style=\"color:#FF0000;\"><span style=\"font-size:14px;\"><span style=\"font-family:tahoma,geneva,sans-serif;\">Dear Spiritual<\/span><\/span><\/span>\n<\/p>\n<p>\n\t<span style=\"color:#FF0000;\"><span style=\"font-size:14px;\"><span style=\"font-family:tahoma,geneva,sans-serif;\">The kind of materialism that you should worry about is usually part of a package; a materialistic person would usually be extremely ambitious, is addicted to brands, judges people based on appearances, is a show-off, is arrogant, and is self-conceited. You said that you are madly in love with your fianc&eacute; of two years; hence, I could safely assume that he is not inflicted with any of the above-mentioned character flaws.<\/span><\/span><\/span>\n<\/p>\n<p>\n\t<span style=\"color:#FF0000;\"><span style=\"font-size:14px;\"><span style=\"font-family:tahoma,geneva,sans-serif;\">Your main problem with this man is that he is not romantic enough for you; you want to live a fairytale where your prince charming literally takes your breath away with awe-inspiring surprises. You are not spiritual; you are romantic! You have watched too many American movies, read too many English novels, listened to too many Arabic songs, memorized too many Disney quotes, and now you are longing to live in one of those bubbles.<\/span><\/span><\/span>\n<\/p>\n<p>\n\t<span style=\"color:#FF0000;\"><span style=\"font-size:14px;\"><span style=\"font-family:tahoma,geneva,sans-serif;\">Your fianc&eacute; probably thinks that all those heart-shaped balloons and creative gift-wrapping ideas are a pure waste of money. He might also think that most fancy restaurants are over-priced and at the end of the day, we all know where digested food goes. I am not defending your man, I am just trying to show you how he thinks and why your romantic notions might never cross his mind.<\/span><\/span><\/span>\n<\/p>\n<p>\n\t<span style=\"color:#FF0000;\"><span style=\"font-size:14px;\"><span style=\"font-family:tahoma,geneva,sans-serif;\">My advice would be: Take the Lead!<\/span><\/span><\/span>\n<\/p>\n<p>\n\t<span style=\"color:#FF0000;\"><span style=\"font-size:14px;\"><span style=\"font-family:tahoma,geneva,sans-serif;\">If it is your birthday, you prepare the romantic setting where he would give you his expensive gift! If it is any special occasion, you take the lead and design all those heartwarming intricacies that would satisfy your fantasies. Stop expecting him to be you! He is who he is and he is expressing his love as best as he could.<\/span><\/span><\/span>\n<\/p>\n<p>\n\t<span style=\"color:#FF0000;\"><span style=\"font-size:14px;\"><span style=\"font-family:tahoma,geneva,sans-serif;\">As for raising the kids, this might be a topic for discussion between the two of you; if you truly want spiritual kids, then you have to totally abolish the concept of reward and punishment! This would include occasion-related gifts and in-case-of obedience rewards. You would give them gifts &ndash; material and symbolic ones &ndash; at any time all the time! You and your husband will also have to find new ways of celebrating special occasions. As a family, you will learn to celebrate the gift of life everyday with gratitude and humbleness. This is the true meaning of spiritualism.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I love him and I\u2019m crazy about him but I\u2019m afraid it will affect my life on the long term in every aspect of our lives. I\u2019m also worried about the way will raise our kids; will we raise them up to be materialistic too? or spiritual?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_eb_attr":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1,16],"tags":[1453,55],"class_list":["post-6967","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-articles","category-identity-magazine","tag-ask-marwa","tag-identity-magazine-2"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- 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\u0645\u0627\u0631\u064a\u0627 \u0645\u0648\u0646\u062a\u064a\u0633\u0648\u0631\u064a\u201d \u0639\u0646 \u0627\u0644\u0637\u0641\u0644 \u0648\u0627\u0644\u0628\u064a\u0626\u0629 \u0627\u0644\u063a\u0646\u064a\u0629 \u0627\u0644\u062a\u064a \u064a\u062d\u062a\u0627\u062c\u0647\u0627 \u0644\u064a\u0646\u0645\u0648 \u0648\u064a\u0632\u062f\u0647\u0631. \u062a\u0644\u062a \u0627\u0644\u0642\u0631\u0627\u0621\u0629 \u0627\u0644\u062d\u0631\u0629 \u062f\u0631\u0627\u0633\u0629 \u0645\u062a\u0639\u0645\u0642\u0629 \u0644\u0644\u0641\u0644\u0633\u0641\u0629 \u0648\u0627\u0644\u0645\u0646\u0647\u062c \u0645\u0639 \u0645\u0631\u0643\u0632 \u201c\u0623\u0645\u0631\u064a\u0643\u0627 \u0627\u0644\u0634\u0645\u0627\u0644\u064a\u0629 \u0644\u0644\u0645\u0648\u0646\u062a\u064a\u0633\u0648\u0631\u064a\u201d\u060cNorth American Montessori 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To say that you love him means that you have an open communication channel and that you actually got to know him up-close and personal. If you are\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a","link":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?cat=1"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/07\/Romantic-Girl-300x300.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":6562,"url":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?p=6562","url_meta":{"origin":6967,"position":1},"title":"Ask Marwa: Dating a DJ and jealous","author":"Marwa Rakha - \u0645\u0631\u0648\u0629 \u0631\u062e\u0627","date":"July 10, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Dating a man with a passion for something is an amazing experience! Just think of the sparkle in his eyes and the vivacity in his voice when he talks about music! I know that you want to come first and I understand that you get jealous of his musical icons\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a","link":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?cat=1"},"img":{"alt_text":"Identity Magazine June","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/07\/Identity-Magazine-June-211x300.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":6148,"url":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?p=6148","url_meta":{"origin":6967,"position":2},"title":"Ask Marwa: Fling Lady","author":"Marwa Rakha - \u0645\u0631\u0648\u0629 \u0631\u062e\u0627","date":"June 15, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"I do not see the problem! I read your email several times and I still failed to identify your problem. They way I see it is that you have a husband that you love, kids that you adore, a steady stable life, and no-strings-attached flings that keep your life spiced\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Articles.\u0645\u0642\u0627\u0644\u0627\u062a","link":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?cat=1"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/marwarakha.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/06\/1-219x300.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":6565,"url":"https:\/\/marwarakha.com\/?p=6565","url_meta":{"origin":6967,"position":3},"title":"Ask Marwa: My BF is a puppy who shits on the carpet!","author":"Marwa Rakha - \u0645\u0631\u0648\u0629 \u0631\u062e\u0627","date":"July 10, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Dear girlfriend of a puppy Men flirt! It is in their genetic composition! 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Any girl who loves her man dreads the day he might leave her for someone prettier, younger, older, more interesting, more experienced, or more anything compared to her. 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