Now a man got hit by a the same bus … read what I had to say to get him back on his feet
—————————–
Dear Marwa,
I hope every thing is going well with you, i just want you to know that i sent to you before from 8 months asking you if i get divorce or not you may not remember me but anyway, iam finally divorced.
i dont see a reason to tell you the story of my divorce because i guess you will already figure out that i will defend my self but i will need to tell you anyway so you can have a full immagination for the problem.
i got married from some one who i knew for 4 years then through this time i figured out that she got engaged without telling me i just found out so that was a big wound in me so i decided to take a chance of traveling away to dubai and i choosed to step beside quietly but after 2 years i found out that she's trying to to get to me by phone and email untill she found me and she told me that she broke up with her fiance and she want to get back to me
i was very upset and i refused for a while untill she decided to travel to me in dubai!! i didnt know what to do untill she came and we spent a wonderful time together and she succeeded to make me forget what happened anyway we came along and we decided to get married my family refused and her family accepted i pushed on my family untill they accepted anyway we got married and along problems between her and my mother happened untill i took her and we traveled to dubai and the real story begun
alot of problems started because of my mother and because she want to dress as she want and she want to get a job and she want to seprate her accomodation from me and so on…
i started to found some people on her facebook she promises them to come and visit them the time she seprate her accomodation from me and things like that and she started when she go out and i tell her not to be late to come at 4 in the morning and so on, and i kept make problems and her family step in and calm me down and i pass it on and so on………………
after a while passed with some terrible problems which i cannot say it cause its just cannot be said, one day i wokeup in the morning and i say good bye to her and went to work after a while she calls me and she told me that she is ready to go to her work and so on.
at the same day after a while i get a phone call from the court of dubai telling me that i have session in court to fix the problems between me and my wife!!!
i thought that there is a mistake or something so i called her but i found out that she is really in court so i went to the session and me and the head of the court heard her ofcourse she said that he doesnt want me to seprate my accomodation from him and he want me to leave my work ( she works and come home at 10 PM ) and some other reasons, so the court told her that all this reasons is nothing and all what you said is from his right on you
so after that i found some dirty chats between her and some other people she knew in egypt and telling them that the times come and this time will be different and words like that and afcourse along with the reasons i cant say, i decided to send her home and get divorce.
i cant tell you how i feel now i cant even describe it am divorced from 8 months now
after i got divorce by 4 months i decided to leave dubai and go back to home so i tried to find a job in egypt and thanks allah i got a really nice job and am very happy in it now.
here is the problem and am sorry that i took too long from your time for that i appologise.
now the real problem is that any girl whatever at work or i used to know before when she calls me or meeting them or whatever i just not interested any more when some girl call me i just want not to answer but some times i had too and i speak so cold and they get upset i know that i have a problem but there is nothing i can do about it.
some people at my work told me about a girl working with us to find out together if something can happens so i decided as she is a good girl to go on and find out why not may be shes really good and something may happens, so we went out for 2 times exactly untill she heard me in work telling some other girl how nice she's dressing, she started talking to me differently with a bad attitude ( please know that i never told her that i love her or anything like that neither is she )
so i asked her what is the reason of that attitude she told me that she heard me talking to that other girl so i told her that was just a nice talking nothing more and anyway we can talk other time when she calm down and since then i decided to end this for many reasons first because i am not in love with her so its better now to end than other time and the wound for her will be bigger and secondly because that will affect my work and that i canot accept.
but the real reason is that am just not interested any more.
sorry again for taking so long but i had to tell you most of the story so can you tell me whats wrong and what to do i just keep working that what am doing now.
Thanks alot
———————————–
Oh my God!!!!
Your message is dripping pain and agony!!!
I am so so sorry … I am so sorry you feel that way and I am so sorry you had to go through this
Your marriage and your divorce is like a terrible accident … your who existence crashed … every bone was broken to tiny little pieces … every hope of survival died!
But you survived!
You did not die!
You are just too wounded and too broken to drive again!
You are too weak and too fragile to get back on the dating scene!
I do not care whose fault it was .. or what you did wrong … or what she did wrong!
I just want you to stop pushing yourself … you need to heal!
Please do not get into relationships at all now … and please avoid women for a while!
Yes! I just asked you to avoid women!
I do not want you to hurt yourself again and I do not want you to hurt anyone else in your healing process.
Here is what I want you to do
1) Sports …. lots of sports! Sports will release endorphins (happy hormones) into your system and will give you a positive body image.
2) Friends … go out with a lot of people … new people … new groups .. nothing deep .. just fun and passing time
3) Community work … when you get involved in other people's misery, your own problems seem to vanish
4) When you feel a little bit stronger, analyze your previous marriage, and learn from your mistakes.
بصوا هنا كمان - You might like those too
